I get it…I am tired too! And not just at the end of the day…all the time! I wake up after 8 hours of sleep tired! But I have committed myself to stop using the phrase “I’m tired” when people ask how I am doing. Chances are, they are tired too and saying it all day is not helping me be less tired. Mind over matter!
Last night I was cleaning up dog poop (the puppy had an accident in her crate) and Joey came over to me and asked me to cut an apple up for her. I wanted to say “are you kidding me right now?! I am knee deep in dog sh$$”. But I held back, remembered that she is only 3 ½, and my child. I asked her “what am I doing right now?” and she replied “cleaning up poopy”. So I told her “when I am finished with this, I will wash my hands, and then I will cut up an apple for you.” She was happy with my answer. She bounced up and down quietly giggling while I finished cleaning. I don’t think she was laughing at my situation, I think she was excited about her apple! So many times I hear parents tell their child “No, not now.” Instead of snapping at them with this response, use it as a teachable moment. If you are busy doing something, ask them to notice what you are doing. Have them tell you why you are busy at the moment. Then explain the steps that you will take to help them get what they want. Kids are still learning and they are very “me” focused. Teach them to look at situations and how to wait for help. Now, Nicki will say to me “mom when you are done with what you are doing can you please help me?” 1 down, 2 to go!
How long is never? “If you don’t go to bed right now, you will never be allowed to watch tv again?” Sound familiar? It is only a matter of time until your kids figure out that using a word like never is an empty threat. Instead, try “if you don’t go to bed right now, you will not be allowed to watch tv tomorrow night before bedtime.”
“Mommy can we get ice cream?” “Next time.” What’s wrong with this? You don’t know what is going to happen next time. You don’t know the future and you better believe that your kids are not going to forget that you said “next time.” This will only lead to disappointment and maybe even a fit. Instead, just explain “sorry, we aren’t getting ice cream today. We will see the next time we come in, maybe we will get it.” I always say “maybe” this gives me more wiggle room!
We don’t say bad girl in our house. Separate your child’s action from your child. If one of the girls does something wrong, we will tell them that what they did was wrong. Make sure to assure your child that you love them but you aren’t happy with what they did.
I love you
Just kidding! Use this one all the time and follow it up with hugs and kisses!!!!